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Random Thoughts about Toddler Eating

I have no idea why it happens, but even kids who were previously good eaters begin to show signs of pickiness sometime between their 1st and 2nd birthdays. Since the little ones don't have much say in many aspects of their lives, it probably has something to do with testing their developing sense of independence. My friend, Kristin, is studying some social psychology aspects of food preferences in kids. Maybe she can weigh in here ;)

I've written a lot about food and eating on this blog - cooking is one of my big interests and has been since I moved into my first apartment. I made ~90% of S&Z's baby food and felt strongly that they be exposed to lots of different flavors, colors and textures early in life. As food lovers, it has been very frustrating for us as the initial signs of toddler pickiness have started to emerge in our kids. Overall I think we're really lucky - Silas continues to be a good eater (although he is sometimes influenced by his sister's bad behavior at the table) - and Zoe isn't terrible (yet). But, they definitely won't eat things straight up like they used to. Refusing or avoiding vegetables is probably the biggest complaint that parents have about their kids' eating. Wariness about new foods often make parents avoid introducing new things. There is something about purchasing and preparing food that gets thrown away (or thrown on the floor, for that matter) that takes the fun out of eating at this stage.

Lunch is the toughest meal for us. The kids are tired from a morning of physical activity and they're getting close to naptime. Depending on Zoe's mood, there may be multiple instances of time-outs given during lunch and she sometimes refuses what is being served altogether. For these reasons, when you find something that both kids will eat you stick with it.

Wendy took a recent poll of her twin mom friends for new lunch ideas and a great list was generated - e-mail me if you'd like a copy (or click here for another such list). One of my new favorites is this sandwich. I found it easier to skip the roll-up part, but Silas & Zoe LOVE this lunch! I guess it's just another "kid milestone", reminding us that they are definitely not babies anymore.



It's tough to get them to eat enough vegetables, so I was happy to get a new idea recently from my friend, Teresa. She uses a steamer basket and cooks up carrot spears, broccoli and califlower. The latter two veg are pretty consistently refused these days, so I fill the basket full of carrots and then store the cooked spears in the fridge. S&Z eat them cold with lunch all week long.

Milk consumption has also been a bit of an issue since the battle of the bottle in the fall. We recently started using take-n-toss cups (instead of leakproof sippy cups) for milk with meals. Surprisingly, they have dramatically increased their milk consumption the last few days through this small change. We'll have to see if it continues...


A book that I have found really helpful in coping with this stage of eating is "Child of Mine" by Ellyn Satter. Her general philosophy is that there is a division of responsibility when it comes to feeding toddlers: parents are responsible for what, when and where, and the child is responsible for how much and whether. This approach makes a lot of sense to us and it has helped Derek and I deal with the daily ups-and-downs of kid eating.

I was pretty thrilled today when the kids ate a tuna melt for lunch. The tuna salad was chock full of celery and carrots but it was essentially disguised as a grilled cheese sandwich. Tuna was something they would have devoured any day 6 months ago... But today it felt like a small triumph. These days, I'll take what I can get. Tonight they shocked me by eating macaroni and blue cheese. And then Zoe proceeded to "eat" 4 carrot spears and spit out every.
single.
bite.
she.
took...

Comments

  1. I am definitely not looking forward to that phase. Both the girls have different preferences (surpise surprise) so it should make for an interesting journey. I've heard alot about "Child of Mine". I'm going to have to get it now and read it soon so I'm prepared :)

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  2. Not that this makes it any more pleasant to be on the parental side of this, but some psychologists have argued that neophobia (i.e., disliking new things) is an evolutionarily adaptive response to the problem that generalist animals like humans face: unlike koalas, humans can and do eat a variety of things. This is a good thing (it means we can survive in a variety of environments) but it's also a dangerous thing (it means that after weaning, we have to figure out what is and what isn't good to eat; and there are a lot of things that are not OK to eat). Clearly humans are pretty good at learning eventually what is and isn't safe to eat, but this takes a while -- and mistakes are costly (e.g., you can get really sick if you ingest something poisonous). So, avoiding foods when you aren't sure if they are going to be safe for you (because you haven't tried them in the past) is actually pretty smart. In fact, a lot of animals do this, and probably live longer lives because of it. The good news is that most kids outgrow their neophobia by the preschool years (perhaps because this is when they have amassed enough information in the food domain). The other piece of good news is that there is a flip side to neophobia -- which is a bias for the familiar in the food domain. This means that if you can get your kids to taste an unfamiliar food/flavor multiple times (even if they spit it out, they still have the flavor experience), studies show that kids are more likely to accept that food at a later date. So, is toddler eating less annoying if you think about it as a "smart" response on the part your child? Maybe not. But I thought I'd try :)
    - Kristin

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  3. @Shal: I wish I would've gotten the Satter book when the babies came home from the hospital. It probably would've been helpful in dealing with premature infant feeding issues too!
    @Kristin: thanks so much for the scientific perspective! Love it!!

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  4. I love your blog! I was laid off recently and I have to take care of my 9 months old boy, who was at a daycare. I feel this part is overwhelmed... since I was at work, I don't know what he can eat or what he not...
    Do you have any adivice for a 9 months old???
    Thanks

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